zippers are such a cool invention
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
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