Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
Just wore the promise ring dad gave me freshman year of high school as a fake wedding band while I bought a pregnancy test. I think it's safe to say that's not what he had in mind with that gift 14 years ago.
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
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