Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
i'm at a stripclub and this bitch just lit her nipples on fire!
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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