How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
Dear Douchebag, I would just like to formally issue this fuck you. You will be receiving a letter in the mail soon. With all of your stuff.
Randomize
