I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
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