come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
Tonight, I'm planning on being a bigger trainwreck than Britney Spears circa 2007.
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
I just set up a proportion to calculate how much Jolly Rancher vodka I can make with the limited amount of Jolly Ranchers I have. Finally, real-life application of math.
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
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