Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
you went over to those random dudes and told them you were an ordained minister and would like to bless their food. they laughed and agreed, then you said "now bow your heads in prayer" as soon as they did you grabbed a taco off their tray and bolted out the door.
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
Randomize
