Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
Randomize
