the new term for farting is butt boxing.
Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
where are my eyebrows?
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize
