it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
My husband was abducted by a group of disco dancers in the parde and danced off down the street. If you see him, tell him to Hustle on home and clean the cat box. #MardiGras
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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