at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
the clerk said it was the first time she had ever seen someone walk in the next day to return the tux still wearing the tux
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
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