No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
Just to circumvent as much mood-killing as possible, you are allowed a small amount of laughter at my pubic hair. Too much and I revoke your vagina privileges until you can get your shit together.
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
Randomize
