also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
Randomize
