Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
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