I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
Randomize
