i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
Randomize
