The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
Randomize
