My hand turned me down
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
25 People Confess The Most Awkward Situation They’ve Ever Been In
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
These Are 21 Of The Most Delusional People Ever
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program