1. Mark my dj buddy and I spent $1000 on bottles last night
2. We were casually offered narcotics while walking down the street
3. I will still be awake when you start school tmw, cause there's no last call
So if any tells you miami is the same as the rest of america, there are just lying to you
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
25 People Confess The Most Ignorant Thing Someone Has Ever Said To Them
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
How external is "for external use only"?
27 Signs That Someone Will Probably Be Bad At Sex
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.