love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
My tinder date wouldn't stop talking about the Star Wars movie trailer long enough to fuck me. HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
Randomize
