I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
I think I just sharted jello shots
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
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