We walked through the hotel lobby in slow-mo taking huge steps because we were astronauts, and astronauts obviously can't be drunk.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
Randomize
