CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
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