I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
so my daughter wakes me up this morning and i feel like a vibration so im thinking she has my phone..nope my vibrator
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
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