Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
You did what with his pubic hair?
Randomize