He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
I was gonna drive but when i tried to use telekinesis to get my keys, I knew I shouldn't be driving
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
Randomize