oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
Randomize
