Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
Randomize
