I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
Drunk me wants sober me to be happy, woke up with half a dozen doughnuts in my bed this morning.
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
