Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
You know that panicky moment when you go home with a guy and realize you’ve been there before?!? HAPPENING RIGHT NOW!!!
Turns out I banged his son a few months ago but the kids back at college so I don’t have to worry about him walking in while Dad has me bent over the couch
Randomize
