I just spit my fake tooth out at a customer. I think he thought it was my bubble gum though so it's ok.
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
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He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
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I just blew my weed a kiss
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize