Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
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