I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
What are you doing tomorrow?
Dude its my bday. Im drinking from sunup til face down. Rinse and repeat.
Randomize
