Skipping work because i'm still too drunk from last night still. got home at midnight and passed out in front of my door for 2 hours bc i couldn't find my key
had to call my rooommate to let us in. Passed out in my dress and found the key on my hair tie-in my hair- just now.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
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