I hate your face
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
My mom just told me to drench my entire body in vodka for 20 minutes. I have never been this russian. no one has ever been this russian
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
Randomize
