only if we run a train.
done.
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
Drunk me made out with someone's girlfriend last night, was invited to their place for a semi-threesome, and then walked home at three am. Can't decide if this is better or worse than drunkenly challenging everyone to taekwondo sparring matches...
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
How is it that 364 days a year I'm the adult, but on Halloween you completely forget how to have fun and become my grandma?
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
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