I am dying of drunk and no thats not a typo.
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
Randomize
