Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize
