I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
When the neighbors threatened to call the cops, he yelled at them that American laws didnt apply to him because he was Danish. He then sang his own version of "America fuck yeah" along to daft punk, then fell down the porch steps. Can we keep him?!?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I cannot be with a girl who won't let me come home on my lunch break, eat spicy ranch and watch Breaking Bad without pants on. #lesbianproblems
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Randomize