So I was talking to her on the phone last night and had to mute it so I could take a crap.
Side Note: My mute button doesn't work.
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
These 25 Drunks Should’ve Gotten Cut Off A Long Time Ago
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
27 Freshmen Who Really Didn’t Know What They Were Getting In To
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.