Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(508): View more from Massachusetts

this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji

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(309): View more from Illinois

dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry

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(972): View more from Texas

you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.

(214): View more from Texas

round 2?

(972): View more from Texas

EVER.

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(317): View more from Indiana

I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.

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Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
Read it at the TFLN blog
(407): View more from Florida

I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.

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(206): View more from Washington

That's why there are breakfast margaritas.

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(801): View more from Utah

She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.

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(951): View more from California

I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home

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(913): View more from Kansas

We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away

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