So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
Hey, don't blame me for the shitty evening; I wasn't the one who promised hookers, Dos Equis and foster kittens. Keith was.
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
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