lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
Randomize
