I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
Convinced the bartender that I'm a congressman. Free Drinks. God bless America.
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
this must be what syphilis tastes like
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
Randomize