WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
Randomize
