I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
You bought champagne and told everyone it was because I'd just found out I was pregnant. How exactly is that being a good wingman?
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
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