Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
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