EVERY baby cries during their baptism. It's like they know from that moment on their parents are going to make them do lame things like their first communion and stuff.
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
27 Signs That Someone Will Probably Be Bad At Sex
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
23 Proposal Horror Stories You Won’t Believe
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.