i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
29 Petty People Reveal The Shallow Reasons They Turned Someone Down
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
21 Horribly Evil Pranks To Play On Your Drunk Friends
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho