dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
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