you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
I wish Morgan Freeman narrated my life.
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
i came out of my blackout when my grandma called last night. it kinda sobered me up and i realized who i had been making out with. should i call and thank her for the defensive cockblock?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
Randomize