So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
I'm shaved like a Brazilian hooker right now.
I have the flu.
I don't give a shit
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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