Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
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