I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
You'll never fully grasp an awkward walk of shame until you run into his mom while you're trying to sneak out. Then to make matters worse you have to ask her to mover car because it's blocking you in.
and I lost my effing shirt.
Randomize
